The Massive Problem With Giving Up.

There has been many times in my life that Iv’e truly wanted to quit. So much so that Iv’e wanted to go outside and scream, kick and throw things.

In my life Iv’e felt pain. Iv’e felt anxiety to the point where I don’t want to talk to anyone for days. That Iv’e wanted to kill myself. But I still do, I still do push forward even though a lot of times I don’t want to suffer, I don’t want to live. And the little things hurt the most. They add up so fast and so aggressively. It’s typically from someone else that makes me angry. It’s literally like people throw rocks in a backpack that I have to carry. And people walk by, they laugh, some feel bad but the majority laugh.

It feels as though I’m being attacked.

Not to mention Iv’e gotten spiritually attacked in my life and that’s even worse. And the thing deep down that I know is I could die right now, I could. But I’m not going to. Like I stated, many times I have no freaking idea why.

There is nothing exciting happening in my life. Nothing that really seems of value to me to live for. The few things is family, god and wanting to prove people wrong.

That I’m going to press forward and I am going to win. It might be a bloody fight against for what I want. Having to literally feel every single what feels like a hard punch to my face… and I…