— I’m the kind of person that you’d see all alone at my own lunch table, eating and possibly sobbing, not on the outside but the inside. Sinking down in disappointment of my own sad character, the one who is literally depressed of being present in the whole room. But I’m real, quite literally I exist even though i don’t feel like it sometimes. And my emotions of the world are so raw and so deep that anyone could cry by the crumbling words i speak. Yet i feel empty in my soul in the depths of my authentic existence, but i don’t mean to be here. I never met to continue but i’m still here i suppose.
Seriously i think i could give you 100–200 realistic reasons why i shouldn’t be here and why you should… and I’m not lying either.
— As I lay on my bed multiple times per day I hear loud screaming voices in my head saying “WHY DO YOU STILL EXIST! WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR DAMN PURPOSE?!”
And to tell you the truth I believe the voices in my head I’m, and I ask myself, yes I ask myself I’m not too sure. ?
But what I do understand is that there are people around me who do care even when I don’t see it.
And there are potential friends waiting for me to announce who i am even though i haven’t seen them in at least a month and only met them once. — The truth is it’s hard to live for others but it’s more difficult to live for yourself. — Really difficult. Sadly painfully difficult.
And once you understand that you should live for both yourself and others but for the time being live for others because it gives your mind a place to not focus on yourself but on others lives. Use your mind and capture memories from other people not the memories your brain sends repeatedly from your past mistakes.
We all create way too much stress on ourselves and it hurts, only bringing us deeper into the water, where we started. It’s one of the most important things to have people helping us through our…